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teenagers

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oh how the tables have turned

My job is an outreach worker with teens 13-24 years old. I haven’t made a formal “I’m pregnant” announcement to them, I decided that instead I’d just deal with reactions/questions as they came up. This has resulted in all five of the girls I see regularly noticing and asking questions, and the other 30-50 boys being completely oblivious to my ever-inflating form (and if I’m honest I find this reassuring, knowing that my body isn’t being closely scrutinized. They are teen boys after all)

Anyway, my coworker and I took a bunch of them out for dinner the other night and had the following conversation. I couldn’t stop laughing, feeling like I was on the opposite end of a talk I’ve had with so many teens over the years.

teen boy: Hey Madeleine can I order a beer?
Me: (sarcasm) Oh sure, why not.
teen boy: Ok cool, don’t worry I’ll order you one too.
teen girl 1 : She can’t have a BEER you idiot, she’s pregnant!
teen boy: You’re pregnant?
Me: Yep
teen boy: PREGNANT?
me: …Yes.
teen girl 2: Was this planned?
me: (laughing) Yes, definitely.
teen boy: Do you know who the dad is?
me: Guys! Yes! I’m fairly sure my husband is the dad.
teen girl 1: You’re MARRIED?
me: oh my god.
teen boy: When were you going to tell us?!
me and coworker: (laughing so hard we can hardly speak)
teen boy: (shaking his head) Pregnant!

**Next day**

teen boy: (walks in, sits down, stares pointedly at my midsection.)
me: Hi.
teen boy: ….
me: ….what’s up?
teen boy: Yeah. I can definitely tell you’re pregnant now. I can see your gut.