The Reveal

WELL! That was illuminating! 

Thank you for letting me pick your brain via my ridiculous internet survey. It  did help, even though as soon as responses started coming in, I was kicking myself because I thought of a million other questions I should have asked, and a billion flaws in the questions I DID ask – my Sociology profs would have been appalled at my research methodology. 

The survey was also invaluable if only because I had the great pleasure of watching my husband hover by the computer all day, watching as he and Olive were neck and neck for the as #1 spot in the “Rank your favorite post topics” question. Every time he edged her out he’d cheer like a maniac and his head would grow two sizes; every time she caught up he would look crestfallen. 

Dude, you’re competing with a SIX MONTH OLD BABY. You can’t win. 

Some highlights:

• Not one person admitted coming here because they googled “Sex Attic”, which is an outright LIE because my site meter tells me that it happens at least two or three times a day. I’m not going to out you, sex attic googlers, but just know that I know why you’re here.

•  The final post-topic popularity results were #1 Olive, #2 Adam, #3 Funny Stories, #4 Gus, aaaand to no one’s surprise, #5 Neurotic Navel gazing by Madeleine. 

• However, the ranking of post topics was calculated using a complex algorithm that my brain is too feeble to understand. this means that while posts about Adam got the most total #1 spot votes, Olive ended up winning because he also had quite a few people ranking him as #4 and #5, where as she only had 1 or two. Does that makes sense? (Also, Adam can you stop giving her the silent treatment? She doesn’t even know that she won. Sticking her tongue out is a developmental milestone and completely coincidental, I swear.)

• One person commented, “I don’t not like Gus. Ranking him #5 makes me feel like a jerk”. I passed that on to the little guy and he farted. Message. Received.

• 24% of you wanted more personal stories and 22% of you wanted more frequent posts,  Daily updates on grooming habits and tooth decay are in the works!

• 20% wanted more pictures, and 18% wanted longer posts, which, yes. I’ll try. 

• Almost 75% of you have never commented, which is actually better than I thought it would be. The most common reasons were that a) you didn’t know how, or b) you didn’t want to seem creepy. 

  Um, hello? I am splashing intimate details about my life onto the internet for public consumption. I am practically begging you for validation in any way, shape or form. Your comments are not creepy or stalkerish! Also, I am going to try and make commenting easier. 

• Things you would like me to write about more included; mom problems, sociology,homemade recipes for cleaning stuff, Canada (really?),celebrity gossip (yes! finally all of this useless knowledge will be put to good use!), more conversations with Adam, and there were even many requests for more pictures of Olive- which left this mama pleased as punch, and happy that I haven’t been annoying everyone by turning this blog into The Olive Show . 

Thank you again for reading, and commenting, and completing strange surveys from an over-sharing Canadian. I promise to keep humiliating my husband and exploiting my daughter for many, many years to come.