Uncategorized

A New Source of Power

(Relevant backstory: My bellybutton has been getting more and more shallow as the months have passed, and is now almost flush with the rest of my stomach with the uppermost lip even protruding a bit.)

Me: (Driving to the grocery store, I raise my shirt and examine my stomach) Hey! Look at my bellybutton!

Adam: Ugh! Ew! Oh my god what’s wrong with you?

Me: My bellybutton’s popping out.

Adam: Well stop it, it’s disgusting!

Me: Adam, I can’t *stop* it, it’s just happening.

Adam: Stop showing me then! That’s the grossest shit ever!

Me: Seriously? (moving closer) This grosses you out?

Adam: Ew yes- get away!

Me: But I think it’s so cute when pregnant ladies have popped out bellybuttons.

Adam: It’s not. It’s not cute. Not at all.

Me: I never knew you felt this way.

Adam: Yes. Please put it away.

Me: Is it because you’re imaging the fetus inside, like, poking it out or something?

Adam: No, it’s just because it’s gross. Outies are gross. Everyone knows that.

Me: (pulling up my shirt again to examine the bellybutton)

Adam: PUT IT AWAY.

Me: Put on your seatbelt.

Adam: Okay! Yes, I will do anything to get that thing to stop looking at me.

Me:

                           funny gifs

Internets, now any time I want my husband to do anything for me, I advance towards him slowly, with one hand threatening to raise my shirt and expose THE ALMOST OUTIE.

Who knew pregnancy had these hidden perks?!

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like

No Comments

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: