I’m going to let you all in on a little secret- as you read this I am standing in a high school gymnasium trying to entice teenagers to spin a giant prize wheel and correctly answer trivia on sex, drugs and resources.

But wait! How can I have just posted this VERY blog entry about being in a high school gymnasium WHILE I was in a high school gymnasium?! Am I a wizard?!

No, friends, The Internets is the wizard here. Apparently there is this thing called a queue where I can pre-write a post and set it up to publish at ANY date in the future!

Miraculous! I can’t believe I’ve been pressing “publish” myself for the past 4 months like a chump! This changes everything!

I’m think I’m going to just start writing light topical posts to publish at random times of the day, like an office worker who logs a lot of hours, not really accomplishing anything other than looking busy.

“Oh look!” they’ll say, “There’s Madeleine posting a 3 am diatribe against imitation Dijon mustard, man does she blog HARD!”

I wish I could do this for real life, record appearances when I’m in the mood to stomach them and then just be able to offer up this prerecorded self in my place. I would have recorded this whole gymnasium-trivia shebang at like 4pm, after I’d had three coffees and a shower.

As is is I’m probably standing bleary eyed and muzzy mouthed, trying not to snap at teenagers for lack of caffeine. (Or maybe I’m chipper and happy and somehow blonde- You don’t know! it’s the FUTURE! Anything could happen!)

Anyway. I’m done at 4 and have a few more (real-time) posts to write for then. In the meantime, please pray.

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