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More like The Big SUCK theory! Yeah!

Adam has started watching a terrible show called “The Big Bang Theory” He has all the disgusting seasons and is working through it chronologically, beginning to end (There IS an end right? This shit can NOT still be airing). At his request I gave it a chance and managed to squirm though a whole seven minutes before forking myself in the eyeballs. HOW IS THIS ON TV?

I loathe it as much as I loathe “Two and a Half Men” and a few minutes in I realized why. Both these ridiculous excuses for comedy sprung forth from the evil hell-dwelling loins of one Chuck Lorre . Oh Chuck I curse you I CURSE YOU! Finally, Charlie Sheen, something we agree on!

Sample dialogue from one such eposide of fuckery:

Nerd 1: You’re in my seat

Laugh track: HAHAHAHAHAHA

Nerd 2: What do you mean?

Laugh Track: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Hot blonde: What’s so special about this seat, anyway? *hair toss*

Laugh track: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Nerd 1: (pseudo-science related joke about the physical/chemical/historical properties of aforementioned seat)

Laugh track: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!

MURDER! That canned laughter is all I hear anymore. The worst part is, ADAM LAUGHS TOO!

What is HAPPENING?!

You guys, I only have so many forks to stick in my eyeballs. I think we can all agree that this is The Worst Thing That Has Ever Happened.

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